MommyCoddle

the waiting game

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First of all and most importantly, THE CAT CAME BACK. Looking full-bellied, content and not at all sure why we were making such a big fuss over his return. Phew. All are sleeping easier now.
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I knew setting up internet service and phone service in our new house would be a bit of a bear when, the day before we moved in Dan said to me, "I'm not even sure if any of the phone jacks in the house work. I tore out all the ones upstairs because the wires were all over the trim. Does a house really need more than one phone jack, anyway? One in the kitchen is plenty."

So of course, it takes a week just to get the phone turned on at your new house, between the hours of 8am and 5pm. And then, when a few hours after being on, the dialtone becomes a deafening buzz, it takes another week to get someone to return to your house, between the hours of 8am and 5pm, to fix it. And then, when the nice man fixes it and you hook up your DSL equipment, it takes four calls to techincal support where you get disconnected three times before you finally get on the phone with someone you can barely understand, who then decides that they need to send someone to your house....in a week....between the hours of 8am and 10pm.

I feel like I've been on house arrest--waiting for the phone man, the gas man, the technical support man, the electric man. In one sense, you know, it's okay. Because really, there's plenty of work for me to do at home. And a little house arrest isn't always such a bad thing. But you know, I really need a garbage can for my trash because when you live in the country you can't just put it out by the shed. And I really need a gallon or two of milk and something to put on the grill tonight besides zucchini (thank you, dear farmers that bring bags of zucchini to my husband at work, for keeping us fed). And the girls are itching for more library books.

But Monday is the magic day. The technical support man will arrive and I'll find out if DSL is even possible in my little 'new' old house. I want to come back to the land of blogging. I miss you all. I have things I want to tell you and things I want to write down in this little space so that I don't forget them.

And I want to be able to check the weather radar to look for storms. Because the girlies and I love to watch for summer storms so that they can get good and scared before they arrive.

And look up a recipe I can't find.

And google "safe tick removal".

In the meantime, I'm trying to bring a few quiet, normal moments back in to our day. Painting a wooden bird house--that gets checked hourly for residents. Putting out a big jar of sun tea. Killing time in the backyard under a shade tree and removing all bits of nastiness from a curious one year old's mouth...rocks, sticks, grass, rocks, rocks, and...should I even tell you this? Dried up, flattened, crusty worm carcasses. (more than one.) Tell me she'll have a great immune system when she gets older, from all these germs she's tasting??? Now, at least, when I walk over to her, she takes them out of her mouth and hands them to me. "mum-mum? mum-mum?" Thanks, babe.

Alright. Once again, it's friday night and I feel like I'm the last one in the office. But that's how it goes when you're stealing an internet signal wherever you can get it....

Happy Weekend, friends.

feels like home

::walking to the stream bringing back mud, rocks, roses and ticks
::finding favorite spots to catch a cool breeze or spot of sun
::entertaining more in the last week than in the last two years
::uncovering old favorites and parting ways with all the extra 'stuff'
::being cut off from the world--no phone, no internet, but finally a little NPR on the kitchen radio
::making new routines, reworking old ones

::watching my children explore and adventure
::swinging and swinging and swinging from the giant tree
::lingering on the deck with my husband, enjoying his company
::watching the groundhogs gorge on my birdseed

::listening to a first storm rumble over the house
::staying cool tucked inside the thick walls of an old house
::watching clumsy kittens explore a new outside world
::enjoying the sound of footsteps on a set of stairs
::worrying about our missing cat

::grilling every meal in the absence of a working stove
::encouraging my children to wander
::feeling tired but...feeling like this is home

this is me :: signing off

It's here. The transition. The uprooting. The move. From garage apartment on my grandparents' farm to a little fixer-upper farmhouse practically within eyesight of where we are now. Just a good walk along the stream and you'd find yourself in our new backyard.

It's been a long, hard road. I'm excited. I'm giddy. I'm exhausted. I'm overwhelmed. The apartment is in that cluttered state as bits and pieces get boxed up or moved around. Things are starting to disappear. Some spaces are looking empty. Others seem so full of 'stuff' that I wonder how we'll ever be out of here by Saturday.

I think the girls are ready too. It's been the big tease these past few months. And especially in the last few weeks as they see their toys and books and dressers disappear from here and show up in their new room. I'm dealing with a lot more whining, more tears, more boredom than I have in quite awhile. I'm trying my best not to shove their needs to the back burner while I pack one more box or do one more load of laundry. They are hungry for my attention.

So, I'm signing off for now. My new internet equipment won't even arrive at the house until Thursday and if all goes well, I'm hoping to see you again here in a week. In a way, I thankful for the forced hiatus. This part of me needs to be quiet for a bit, while I work to settle in to our new house and make it our new home.

I'll be popping in to check email here and there, as I can, if I can.

Thank you for following along in this journey with me--being a place to unload, share progress,excitement, frustration and joy.

Life is sweeter when you can share it with dear friends.

See you on the other side.
xo.
molly

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I'll announce the giveaway winner a little later today, at the bottom of that post.

going green and healthy:: with my laundry:: part II

The heat wave has moved on and my brain has finally awaked from its heat-induced coma. Man! that heat and humidity just sucked all the life out of me....but storms rumbled through last night bringing sweet relief, better attitudes and a beautiful day.

I've been meaning to get back to the discussion about my pursuit of healthier and greener laundry practices. So finally today I want to share a few more things I've found and I have a giveaway!!

One of the other products I tried from the Gaiam catalog, (which I love) was the Wonder Ball. The Wonder Ball claims that you can eliminate all laundry soap from your wash, which is good for the water supply, good for the environment. And by eliminating laundry soap, you obviously eliminate any chemicals or dyes that might be irritating to your skin. Apparently, there are some petrochemicals and minerals inside the ball that change the surface tension of the water in your machine that make the water "wetter" and allow it to penetrate your clothes fibers and wash more deeply.

Did I lose you on that one? I'm not sure I completely understand it myself.

But here's why I am liking the Wonder Ball: I have to confess that I have not been brave enough to try it sans all detergent. But the other claim it makes is that you can use it with less detergent. So when I ran out of Nellie's Nuggets and had to go back to regular detergent for awhile, I was able to use about one third of the detergent I normally would.  This made everything seem less harsh and perfumey, it was still making my water less chemical-laden and it was saving me money. The wonder ball may seem a bit pricey, but it lasts 3 years or 2000 washes and if you can cut back on the amount of detergent you are using, it would save you money in the long run. So if Nellie's Nuggets or other green laundry detergents are out of your price range or inconvenient to come by, this might be a good option.

The other laundry product that I'm really excited about is for the dryer. When the temperatures start to warm, most of my laundry goes on the clothesline which is the ultimate in saving money, energy and avoiding sticky dryer sheets. But in the winter months (though I've been known to hang out laundry with my mittens on) and for those personal items that I don't like to hang on the laundry line--I am now in love with dryer balls.

Two of these little blue-spiked beauties go in with your laundry and work to separate and soften your laundry. This also allows more air to pass through your clothes and speeds up drying time. Once again, I was skeptical, but I was proven wrong. I definitely noticed a difference in length of time it took my clothes to dry. I would estimate they were drying about 25% faster--which ironically is what it claims to do. The other thing I like about the dryer balls is no more dryer sheets which make my clothes feel sticky and slimy--a difference I did not notice until I stopped using them. But what a difference it was! And I also like the fact that when I put just a few things in my dryer--not exactly "green", I know--the dryer balls help to keep things fluffed and moving around instead of all clumping together in the corner--and those few things are dried so quickly.

The dryer balls are inexpensive. And they will last two years--as long as they don't get lost in the same land where socks disappear to. And thankfully, they are made from non-toxic materials because my teething babe really enjoys chewing on those bumpy spikes. And before your children chuck them across the room to see how high they will bounce--they really don't bounce. Oh, and one more thing--they aren't noticeably noisy--at least not to me. And remember, my washer/dryer is in my kitchen, which is in my living room, which is in my bedroom. And I really don't notice it.

They sound good, don't they? Good! Because the lovely people at Nellie's All-Natural (thank you, jackie!) sent me a set to giveaway!! Yippee!

So leave a comment and let me know you're interested and I will draw a name at the end of the week. But do me a favor...would you mind telling me your secret to stain-removal? Do you have a product you love? Or a technique?--besides not letting the stained clothes sit in the laundry bin for a week. Guilty. I'd love to hear it. And if you don't have a secret, no big deal--I have no special secret either.

But did you see those strawberry stains???

********THE WINNER IS: MARYBETH! Send me an email with your address and I'll pop them in the mail!*****

signs of summer

I know I was supposed to write another installment in my green laundry "series" this week, but time got the best of me, and other posts got in the way. But I promise I'll share more early next week. I have some more good things to pass along and a giveaway! :) So be watching.

Summer has suddenly arrived around here and with that the much anticipated filling of the pool. The pool here on my grandparents' farm has been around since the 30s or 40s. Most of it was dug out with work horses and then some excavating tools at the end. It is spring-fed and sucks the breath straight out of your chest when you dive in. But oh, how good it feels on a sticky, hot summer day. The other thing I love about it, is that it hasn't changed a bit since I was a little toddling bare-bummed swimmer many years ago--except for the fact that there's no longer a giant red crab painted on the bottom, and I've sewed new curtains for the girls' side of the pool house. While we wait the few days for the pool to fill, it is like a concrete beach for the girls to play in, the perfect warm-up to refresh their swimming muscles and techniques.

Last summer was the year I sat poolside with a hot, sticky newborn attached to my chest making me sweat in places where I didn't know possible. This year, I've graduated to baby pool life guard and hose-holder. Things are looking up.

Yesterday, the girls swam with two frogs who somehow made it up the drain to hang out in the cool water of the pool. Their panicked squeals turned to curiosity after I gave the frogs names--my trick for making all scary things seem like pals--Besty the bumble bee who flies all over our porch and sometimes in your face, Paul the spider who lives in the corner of our shower, and Charlie the fly who is...basically everywhere and even followed us all the way from Wisconsin to Maryland. The naming thing works like a charm.

This morning I started my last batch of strawberry jam for the season. My chubby-fisted friend will be sorry to see them go. Ive always know she had all the skills and muscles she needed to walk, she just needed the right incentive. This morning, she took four confident steps across the kitchen floor for the big bowl of berries I was holding out to her. My girl's got a thing for the berries.

I just don't recommend giving them to her outside and then letting her crawl around in the dirt...not a good combo, but good for a laugh and a bath in the kitchen sink.

**messy strawberry pix courtesy of my cousin...thanks, Mags!**

Happy Weekend!

m.

chaos reigns in mollycoddle land

I have full grocery bags sitting on the kitchen floor, an unmade bed staring me in the face, and three kittens scampering around my living room. Yet here I sit. Blogging. I love it.

You know, when I told Emma she could bring a kitten in to the house, I was anticiapting that we'd be moving in to the new house THAT weekend. Now I find myself changing "glitter" boxes, picking bits of dry catfood off the bottoms of my feet when I step out of the shower and peeling the little claws of dangling kittens off my window screens. The kittens have taken over our bathroom and are slowly taking over the house. Their "house" is in the bathroom--the bathroom that is already a step-sideways-if-more-than-one-person-is-in-there kind of bathroom. The bathroom where the sink sits tenderly on brackets on the wall...brackets that are expecting a set of metal legs to help hold up some of the weight. Metal legs that are no longer there. And when you bump a little too hard into the sink you find you're holding it in your hands and scrambling to turn off the water before it leaks all over your bathroom floor. So adding three kittens, a litter box, a water and food bowl in that bathroom? It makes things a little tight and a little tricky.

Sometimes the chaos I endure for my children is mind-boggling.

And when did our one kitten become three? Well, when Mary had a fit of jealousy over Emma having Rosie and her having nothing. Which dredged up all kinds of memories of her "Springy", last year's kitten that got hit by a car and now lives with Jesus. The one that makes her announce out of the blue, "I want to get flattened like Springy so I can go to heaven and be with him and Jesus." oy.

So, the orange kitten, "Orange Juicy", then "Juicy", now "Juice", came to live in our bathroom. And then that left Juice's brother all by himself in the big scary outdoors and "wouldn't he miss his brother and be lonely?" Tears. Tears. More tears. A weak mother. And now there are three...Rosie. Juice. And, Prancer.

As I said before...the chaos I endure....

And what do these pictures have to do with kittens taking over the house? Nothing, really. Except that maybe you could say they are symbolic of some of the chaos that has been reigning in these parts lately. Bed-jumping is generally frowned upon in this house. As my mother said to me, and I now say to my own children, "this always ends in tears." But yesterday, Emma cleaned her room, made both beds and pushed them together, all of her own doing. I figured a good bed-jumping episode could be overlooked (and photographed).

Some days we could all use a good jump on the bed.

starting fresh: my quest for creative, simple kid spaces

Dan and I are doing what we lovingly refer to as "trickling" over to the new house. I doubt we'll ever have a big moving day. But someday soon, we'll find that we're miraculously spending the night over at the new house. Last weekend, the girls took naps over there--Elizabeth in a pack n' play in her room (pack n' play naps are never good), and the girls together in the big double bed in the guest room/office. The guest room is one of my favorite rooms in the house. It boasts the best light--with windows on both sides--and the best bed--a big soft pillow top that we "inherited". I told Dan that if he notices an absence of his wife by his side come morning, to look for me in the guest room.

Each day, a few more things disappear from the apartment--a desk, a rug, a bookcase. And every time I take something away, I am reminded of how refreshing and peaceful it is to keep things simple. To only have what you really need and really want.

When I took away some things yesterday, I did a little rearrange of the spaces that were left bare--throwing a few pillows in a corner with a basket of books, bringing out a basket of schleichs and a wooden barn...and immediately the spaces are filled with activity as each child found their special place to play.

It reminds me that children don't need much to stir their creativity.

So I've been doing a little research, going to a few of my favorite, books and catalogs for inspiration. And I'm making a list of what things I want the girls to have in our new house. Which toys and materials and spaces are most important to us--a dollhouse, a basket of blocks, a can of colored pencils and sketch books, a corner of throw pillows and books, an old suitcase of dress up clothes...

I'm taking this move as a chance to start fresh, to simplify, to clean out and to be more intentional about what things find their way into our new home.

I know we won't find that perfect balance right away. It is a work in progress. My research is often interrupted...ahem, Elizabeth!  And I believe you need to live in a space for awhile to see how you live in a space. I'll let you know how it goes, maybe I'll even share my list as I try to organize my way into simpler, more creative, peaceful surroundings.

I love starting fresh.

first grade here we come

First grade here we come.

Last week was our first homeschooling review and it all went really well. In reality, it was approached more like a celebration of the year versus a check-up and evaluation. And it was really good for me, to be forced to take stock of all that we had done during our first year of "official" homeschooling.

I'll be honest, there were many days where I was ready to throw in the towel, many emails to a few friends begging for advice and encouragement, and days when I questioned if this was the right decision for our family. For me. For Emma.

I learned a lot this year, and I hope Emma did, too. I know Mary did, which is one of the amazing perks of homeschooling. How the little ones can come along for the ride and benefit so much from it. Mary's gone from glazing over when I talked about letters to making very successful attempts at spelling words and trying to read. She begs for school.

I feel like Emma and I reached a sweet spot early this spring. An understanding, perhaps. And I hope that will carry over to next year. I think the physical circumstances will be better next year, things that have made it a little difficult this year--the distractions of living here on the farm, a small apartment where it is hard to find her own spot to work without distraction...

And can I tell you how much relief I felt when a few weeks ago, driving in the car, Emma told me she wanted to be homeschooled again next year? It was a wave of reassurance washing over me. This is what she chooses. This is what she wants, too.

She was still awake when I got home from my review late Thursday night. I went into her room to kiss her goodnight and she nervously asked from under her quilts, "What did they say?" And I could tell she was hiding a very large, very proud smile under all those blankets as I told her how well everything went and how she'd soon be able to call herself a first grader. And that made her happy. And a wave of reassurance (and sleep) washed over her as well. I'm pretty sure of that.

(and what does this post have to do with the picture? absolutely nothing. but when you completely clean out your iphoto and put everything on an external hard drive like a responsible photographer/mother/blogger, you lose that easy-access to some of your old 'go to' pictures.
But this would be one of my grandmother's beautiful roses...and that rain? That would be the rain that arrived the moment my door slammed behind me as I stepped inside from hanging my laundry on the clothesline. Another rinse, perhaps? Or another rinse in acid rain, as my grandmother put it....)

Going green and healthy :: with my laundry :: part 1

After Elizabeth was born, and I had a new set of sensitive skin in my house, I knew that I wanted to begin to address something that I'd been thinking about for quite awhile--a greener and healthier approach to doing laundry. Not only did I want to try to find some laundry detergents and products that were safer and gentler--free of all kinds of chemicals and dyes, I wanted to find ways to make my laundry more efficient, cost-effective, and in the end, perhaps a little more "green".

So let's start with the healthy part. One of the main reasons, as silly as it may sound, that I shy away from natural, free of everything cleaners is because I'm addicted to the smell of clean. I know it sounds silly, but that is how I judge how clean something is, by how it smells. If my clothes don't come out of the washing machine and dryer smelling like Tide Mountain Breeze and Bounce Outdoor Fresh, I think they must not be really clean.

But once I started using some of these products, my perspective on what clean really is, changed.


I have to admit, that I was very skeptical of these green cleaning products. For starters, I feared that they wouldn't do the job as well as their chemical, full-of-everything counterparts. But I was wrong. The first product that I tried was Nellie's Laundry Nuggets. They are pre-measured hypo allergenic laundry nuggets that you drop into your wash--no measuring required. I love the no measuring, no waste part because I always get a little fidgety about how much to put in--is this a full load? a medium load? do I really need THAT much soap? What's the minimum amount of soap I can get away with using? So, these little nuggets were really exciting to me. I know, I know I get excited about simple things.

My only critique of the nuggets--some of them broke open and I had to measure how much was in each one in order to use up the loose powder at the bottom of the bucket. No biggie, but when the selling factor is the little pre-packaged cuteness, measuring isn't as exciting.

So the bottom line? I love the nuggets. I'm a convert. I've discovered that clean can be a smell--Nellie's Nuggets do have a mild fragrance--but clean is also the way my laundry feels. I wouldn't have believed it, until I tried it, but the first thing I noticed is how soft my clothes feel. They feel awesome. When I ran out of Nellie's Nuggets and started using Tide again, I was shocked at how scratchy and grimy my clothes felt when they came out of the wash--they felt like they had a residue or film on them. The didn't feel soft and fresh and new or clean. I was honestly shocked by the difference. And that difference sold me. Oh, and couple that with the fact that Mary and Dan both started having fits of itching once I switched back to Tide. Mary was in tears some days because she felt itchy all over her body. I can only believe it had something to do with the switch back to our old detergent. **edited to add: Nellie's Nuggets are front-load, HE compatible.**

And for the record, no, I don't work for Nellie's. I'm just one of those people who love sharing new, good finds.

And I still have a few more finds to share with you on my journey to cleaner, healthier, green laundry. I'll share them with you here, in the next few days. **edited to add: for those of you asking, I'll be talking about one more laundry wash product and then two dryer products.** Followed by a few laundry line tips I've "inherited" from my grandmother. Because I truly believe that we should look to the habits and practices of that generation to see what living green and living healthy should really look like.

Happy Thursday.

things I've learned, please be sure to read no. 3

1. There are certain milestones you look forward to your children reaching--first smile, first tooth, first time they reach for you to pick them up, first shaky steps across the floor...however, the one milestone I'm less than thrilled about Elizabeth reaching this week is how to pull herself up on to the sofa. Where she finds it quite comical to stand up holding on to the back, then let go and allow herself to do a free fall plop down on to her rumpus, and/or back, depending upon how she sticks the landing. And of course a baby masters how to climb up on the sofa without a firm set of safety precautions established in her repertoire, or a means for getting down from said sofa that doesn't require tears and bruised cheeks, or help from her mother. I've been spending a lot of time on my sofa the past few days.



2. You will always be able to find someone else in a situation that is worse or harder than what you are going through. But that doesn't diminish or negate what you are experiencing or feeling. When a person needs a shoulder to cry on, an ear to complain in, be that shoulder or that ear. And in that moment, don't remind them that other people have it worse or harder.  It's like the person who has one child and is experiencing a struggle can't complain to the person who has three or four children because how could her simple life, with only one child ever be as complicated as the person with three? That's just not fair. And life can't be broken down so simply. You have a right to feel what you are feeling, to struggle where you are struggling. And you have the right to be comforted and to give comfort.



3. You all do number two perfectly. I'm not sure I can say that I've ever read my blog comments through teary eyes, but this weekend and this morning, I did. I just needed that little bit of 'chin up' understanding and encouragement that came through in your words. When I talk to people who don't know blogging, the first thing I remark on is the community. But not the kind of community where the neighbors growl and groan behind closed doors about this person's noisy kids or that person's weedy front garden. But the kind of community where people wander from front porches, and linger together on the sidewalk. And share a cup of coffee, or pass along an extra quart of strawberries, or pick up their neighbor's tipped over garbage cans that have blown into the street. It's a community where people go out of their way to be nice, to encourage, to support, to help. Thank you. Over and over.

4. Is there much in this world that tastes better than strawberries that are still warm from being plucked from the vine? I don't think so.